13 MAR 2023

mood:
listening to: nothing rn
weather: cloudy

hey everyone =) i think i am going to be adjusting how i do blog posts. instead of a long weekly entry, i think i'll just write entries whenever it strikes me to do so as i find myself thinking "ill write about this on friday" then i never do and end up rambling instead.

today was my first day back at school and work after spring break, it made me really nervous to go back for some reason. i think in general i kind of had a weird weekend but i have come out of it with clarity towards my life goals. there are some big plans that i have brewing and it feels like ive put in so much effort to get to where i'm at now that i don't want to suddenly change course but i have a better idea of what i want from life now.

i didn't have class this morning since my 830 class was just for the term. so i didn't have to be at school until 1:00 which was really nice. next semester will probably be busier though since there will be more classes for me to actually register for, but i am starting to question if what i'm pursuing is even right for me.

today i got to prune some trees and clear out some brush that needed to be cut back, there's still a lot of work left but work was over for the day and it was time to go home. it's always frustrating to leave something half finished, but it'll still be there for me to work on tomorrow. i really like this job, there's a lot that i still have to get better at and learn but i can tell that i'm starting to get much more confident with stuff like using a brushcutter, etc.

i'm also starting to look into getting a house - something that feels so far beyond me but there are a lot of really good options because of my background and status as a disabled vet and my brother who just recently got his first house gave me some advice. it's still just a dream right now as i am nowhere near being ready to do that but i guess the first step is planning right... i have too many big expenses coming up anyways as my beloved car is about to fall apart any day now... blah

i don't really want anything big or new/rennovated, just something that has electricity and running water. the rest is all stuff that i can take care of, just as long as it's away from the city and people. i realize now that i was so happy and felt so aligned in my old apartment because even though it was falling apart and very old i was away from people for the most part.

like i said, it's still just in the works! but maybe in the next few years something might come out of it. i still have plenty i need to research/save for and who knows maybe the economy will explode before i make it to that point.

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